Social Resources
Relationships
(also see Bias)
Advocacy/Services
Articles/Essays/Op-eds
One Man's Tale on Relationships, Bill Betzler
Two weeks ago, I went on a men's retreat. Followed along the IRON JOHN narrative of years ago - male initiation, male wounds, male grief, male bonding, male transformation. It was OK for me. Did have opportunity to say out loud to all 35 guys what my core wound was: As a child I was a sexual object. I listened to all the others. There were a few deaths of children or parents or spouses. By far the largest number of wounds had to do w/ feelings of inadequacy & in that awareness that their lives weren't working. (posted in Relationships) [read more]
Buber’s I-Thou Relationships, ChatGPT
On 8/8/24, I asked ChatGPT, “What does Martin Buber mean by an ‘I-Thou dialogue’?” It replied:
Martin Buber, a 20th-century philosopher, is best known for his philosophy of dialogue, particularly articulated in his work “I and Thou” (Ich und Du). In this text, Buber presents two fundamental ways of engaging with the world and with others: the “I-Thou” relationship and the “I-It” relationship…. (read more)
Self Care, Penn Garvin.
“There is self care of oneself and there is also self care of the movement. Self care of the movement means that we look closely at (1) how we treat each other (2) how we support each other (3) how we give each other permission to rest, relax and have fun (4) how we hold each other accountable for saying what we do and doing what we say (5) how we model a movement that those not presently involved are drawn to be a part of and (6) how we come through this difficult period of time better and not bitter.”
Old Brain, New Brain, Cross-Partisan Dialog, Penn Garvin, Lois Passi, Wade Lee Hudson.
Talk With Your Enemy? Dialogue about Dialogue, Alan Levin.
"[. . .] I have to admit to being a slow learner in being able to talk with people who disagree with me politically, especially if they are conservative or right-wing. A helpful teaching for me is that we are not our ideas. I am not my beliefs and therefore neither is anyone else."
Close Friends Less Common Today, Study Finds, Jeanna Bryner.
“Americans' lists of the close type has shrunk to two, down from three confidantes 25 years ago, a new study suggests.”
Now Hear This! Most People Stink at Listening [Excerpt], Bob Sullivan and Hugh Thompson.
In what may be a dangerous trend, the influx of digital gadgets into daily life has made people super productive, yet much less attentive and able to focus on any single detail.
Why are women penalized for success at male tasks?: The implied communality deficit, Madeline E. Heilman, Tyler G Okimoto.
"Results indicated that the negativity directed at successful female managers-in ratings of likability, interpersonal hostility, and boss desirability-was mitigated when there was indication that they were communal."
Platinum Communication Tutorial: Communicating in Today’s World, Larry Walker.
“Communication is the foundation for relationships and teamwork. Relationships and teamwork are valuable for each of us [. . .] Breaking up an organizational logjam requires finding the key log that locks the logjam in place.” [See Platinum Communication: Treating Others The Way They Want To Be Treated, Warren M Hoffman]
Critique vs. Criticism Thomas P Seager, PhD — How to give good feedback and still benefit from bad.
Why It’s So Hard to Hear Negative Feedback By Tim Herrera.
Why Office Friendships Can Feel So Awkward, By Melissa Dahl.
In-Group Favoritism Is Difficult to Change, Even When the Social Groups Are Meaningless, By Scott Barry Kaufman.
The Power of Yes, Wade Lee Hudson.
“Positive words benefit the brain. As reported by Andrew Newberg, M.D. and Mark Waldman, thinking, hearing, speaking, and reading positive messages lowers stress and helps people respond quickly, deal with problems, live longer, develop satisfying relationships, be flexible, and become more caring.”
Books
“Small Talk” Books
An Amazon Books "small talk" search reports 90 books that have the phrase in the title or subtitle. Most of these books offer ways to improve small talk. Many present career advancement methods. Some suggest ways to use small talk as a step toward deeper conversation. A few adopt a more critical stance, including these:
Platinum Communication: Treating Others The Way They Want To Be Treated, Warren M Hoffman.
“Convert intractable social problems to aspirations.The Platinum Rule is simple and direct. "Treat others the way they want to be treated". Know your audience first and then act. Avoid acting without really knowing the other person. The Platinum Rule puts others first.” [See Platinum Communication Tutorial: Communicating in Today’s World, Larry Walker.]